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Tag Archives: relationships
Birthdays, Pea Soup, Thai Crabcakes, Chocolate Fudge Cake and the Unthought Known
I’ve had two patients this week who’ve been bowled over by realising something they already knew. It’s funny in therapy and analysis that you rarely have huge epiphanies that involve things you’ve never thought about before. All those recovered memory … Continue reading
“My new wife hasn’t cured me of my grief, loss and depression. Shall I leave her?” Psychotherapeutic advice for real change.
I hardly know where to start as I’m so mixed up and unsettled. Six years ago I married for the second time, after four years alone, which were spent searching desperately for Mrs Right. In 2008, by some good fortune, … Continue reading
Posted in advice, psychoanalysis, psychotherapy, Uncategorized
Tagged advice, bereavement, cure, depression, despair, divorce, grief, loss, marriage, psychoanalysis, psychotherapy, relationships, second marriage
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“I’m a gay man looking for someone I both like and fancy. Why is it so difficult?”
I’m a single man in my mid-30s. I was something of a monogamist throughout my 20s with only three relationships by 30. I’ve now been single for six years. I’ve had one relationship that I felt very happy in, but … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged gay, intimacy, Klein, needle in a haystack, relationships, virgin whore
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“I hate my needy girlfriend but I can’t leave her. Help.” Proper Advice for Real Change.
I am a 30-year-old man in a professional job. My career is going well, but the one thing in my life I am not enjoying is my relationship. My girlfriend, 25, has a beautiful five-year-old daughter, who I adore, and … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged clingy, needy, omnipotent fantasy, power, projection, psychoanalysis, psychotherapy, relationships, single mum
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“I followed a pop star to his hotel when I was 15 and he abused me. I’m still angry.” Proper Advice for Real Change
“Recent investigations into Jimmy Savile and others make me want to tell you about what happened 38 years ago. At 15 I was ‘in love’ with a member of a glam-rock band. I’d never had a boyfriend but collected pictures … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged childhood sexual abuse, fantasy, men, Paedophilia, power, projection, relationships, sexual abuse, survivor, worthlessness
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“Men don’t notice me. What am I doing wrong?” Proper Advice for Real Change
“I’m writing in hope that you can offer some clarity. I’m 32 and soon my mum (my only family) will pass away after a long illness. This in itself is incredibly distressing, yet the reason I write is selfish and … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged counselling, depression, loneliness, misandry, mothers, mourning, relationships, solitude, spinster
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“My new boyfriend prefers porn stars who don’t look like me to real sex with me.” Real Advice for Lasting Change
“I have been dating my boyfriend for almost seven months. We have had our ups and many, many downs, but we are still working on our relationship — physically and emotionally. Recently, I’ve become aware that my boyfriend has been … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged emotional abuse, neglect, pornography, relationships, self-worth
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“I’m impotent and my wife’s having an e-affair with a martial arts expert.” Real Advice for Lasting Change.
“One night about six years ago, on my way home I was assaulted by a drunken female and punched in my groin area. The hospital told me that I wouldn’t be able to father any more children. I found it … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged castration, castration anxiety, marriage, masochism, penis envy, relationships, repressed homosexuality, sadism, sadomasochism
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“My lover only wants sex. I want a relationship. Oh, and I was sexually abused as a child…” Thoughtful Advice for Lasting Change
“At 50, I’ve been single for 11 years after a very abusive marriage. When I finally managed to get rid of my husband I decided to concentrate on my ten-year-old and one-year-old. During that time I saw the occasional man, … Continue reading
“I left my horrid husband after 28 years, but now he’s seeing my ex-best friend and I’m mad with rage.” Proper Advice from a Psychoanalytic Perspective. No Glib Life Tips (I promise).
“After a difficult 28-year marriage (which produced four fantastic children), I asked my husband for a separation. He’d been moody and withdrawn for many years — very rude to and about people, especially if they were close to me. He … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged confusion, divorce, doubt, jealousy, marriage, psychological problems, rage, relationships, separation
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